June 2011
68 posts
i don't feel any better.
i just want to be normal.
i have OCD.
and there’s all this stuff i need to say. not because i want to say it, but because my psychologist says that if i do, it’ll probably help me get past this impasse.
an impasse, as defined by the almighty wiktionary, is “a deadlock or stalemate situation in which no progress can be made”.
and i need to get past this impasse. i need to make progress. granted, there are...
i miss my old psychologist. :(
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Alan: He's out in the garage with Larry. He's upset. Well I can see why now.
Don: What's he doing in the garage?
Alan: He's just working that problem, y'know...
Don: What?
Alan: That problem he can never solve.
Don: The P vs. P thing?
Alan: Yeah, that's the one.
Don: Aw man...
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*post-coital happy dance*
woooo
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so i had this really awesome dream last night.
it was about archery; i was fucking awesome at it. and then these army guys showed up to practice archery, and this general said i was way better than any of them and that i had a lot of potential.
and i woke up REALLY wanting to do archery, but i’m poor and can’t. :(
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I'M FUCKING MELTING
nevermind, they weren't that great
gonna eat some gnocchi now, guyz.
be jealous.
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it's fucking hot.
it’s 29° (84°F) inside the apartment; 35° (95°F) outside.
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butter chicken for dinner tonight.
fuck yes.
everything's ok now, guyz.
except no indian restaurant tonight =/
seems i've chosen "worried as fuck"
not sure whether to be worried as fuck or pissed...
:S
so like, i've lived in France for a year now.
it's not getting any better.
fml.
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what's that? another empty promise of sex?
sorry; i can’t hear you over the sound of me fapping.
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i still want to go off somewhere alone with a pack...
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L: I am going to bed! As I am quite tired.
me: OK. sleep well
L: Sure will! I sleep like a pro!
all i remember is bits and pieces (mostly things...
dancing like an ass
calling a bartender a cocksucker (he wouldn’t let me use the bathroom)
falling down (apparently more than once?)
pissing behind some construction barriers in the street
vomiting in the metro
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what the fuck happened last night?
cos honestly i have no clue.
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that awkward moment when your french psychologist...
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cleaned the whole fucking apartment. it took me...
that’s kinda ridiculous.
anyway, this is one of the rare moments i’m actually glad our apartment is only 25 m².
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i'm tired.
i’m tired of holding everything in until i break down. tired of the nightmares. tired of myself. tired of the intrusive thoughts. tired of sleeping poorly.
i wish i were back on my meds. i wish i could smoke as much as i want too. i wish i hadn’t made that fucking stupid promise, even if it’s better for me that way.
sometimes i wish i were back in B-town, getting drunk as hell...
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“Well the truth is that I don’t like people much. And they don’t much...”
– John Nash, “A Beautiful Mind”
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i wish Pascal would quit saying "you're not sick;...
i am sick.
i think the only time i really only ever...
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i wish my face didn't think that i'm going through...
fuck this shit; i’m almost 20. puberty was ages ago.
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“Ferret legging, also known as put ‘em down and ferret-down-trousers, is a...”
– um, okay…
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happy birthday to the only person on tumblr i know...
(it’s already monday here in France, so technically it’s already your birthday)
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i guess if i had to choose how to die,
i’d choose death by kittens.
or getting eaten by a shark. or a t-rex. or a velociraptor.
but yeah, kittens.
that awkward moment when you don't know if a car...
niknacks:
gabbysantos13:
Epic GIF.
Story of my life.
THIS.
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i kinda just want to go somewhere
where i’ll be completely alone. alone with my Dostoevsky books, Russian Standard vodka, and smokes. and then take the time to find out what i really think and believe and who i really am.
but i can’t.
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me: if you could live in any era, which would you pick
the Italian: boston
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